The above title describes my current state very well! I just can't seem to decide what to do. To blog or not to blog. To carry on with making my creations and trying to sell them or not?
Further to my last post announcing that I wouldn't be blogging anymore, I've kind of changed my mind. I've just been taking a little wander around blog land and I know that I would miss it. It's just that I've slightly lost my blogging oomph at bit. It has a great deal to do with the fact I'm still unemployed. It's now 10 months since I lost my job. I girl can only take so many knock backs and in a market where there are so few jobs to apply for it's disheartening when the ones you do apply for you are either under qualified or as today, over-qualified. I went for a job at a bathroom showroom recently. It was mainly sales but when they saw my CV they started talking about offering a design service. All in all I had three interviews with them taking about 3 and a half hours in total, not to mention the research time I spent and the time putting together some ideas of what I could offer. Only to find that they have given the job to another candidate who will be able to 'shift bathrooms quickly' apparently! They say they would like to work with me perhaps on a free-lance basis offering a design service but I'm not holding my breathe. I have a feeling it's all talk and at the end of the day it's not a job with a salary which is what I really need.
So you can probably understand a little of why I'm feeling rather fed up lately. I've lost all my creative inspiration too which is why there is nothing new in the etsy shop. I'm hoping to sell everything off with the hope of a. making a few much needed pennies, and b. having empty studio shelves in the hope of inspiring myself to make some new things.
But my little roam around blog land has given me just a little bit of a boost this evening and reminded me what I used to love about blogging. I've just been looking at Jane's gorgeous new bathroom which cheered me up no end. And a went on a lovely walk around Niki's village which definitely put a smile on my face. There were many other lovely things to be seen on my travels. I want to still be a part of this. I don't want to give up.
I'M STILL HERE and I'll try to cheer myself up a bit and write some pretty blog posts again. Bare with me will you?